You are planning to get married in a week, a month, a year. Sweaty palms. Second thoughts. Cold feet. These are all normal feelings for a bride or groom. But one thing that can help is talking about marriage before the wedding. This may seem obvious, but it’s a must for every couple.
Experts agree that communication is the key to any marriage and often give rules or tips on how to communicate effectively. But what is that one question that will help you plan for your marriage, that probing inquiry that will open communication for you and your fiancée, and help control your wedding jitters?
Do you like the Boston Red Sox or the New York Yankees?
Yes, really. This has nothing to do with whether or not the bride or groom like, watch or know anything about baseball. So while most can recognize the infamous Red Sox and Yankees rivalry, how it applies to your wedding has little to do with the ERA, double play or any sports lingo. And hey, if your fiancée just happens to be a sports fanatic who hates talking about marriage, than this tactic is just an extra plus for you.
Talking about these two teams brings up a myriad of subjects for you and your future spouse to discuss, such as:
MONEY. The payrolls of the Red Sox and Yankees are in the hundred millions and by far the largest in the entire Major League. Discussing how the teams pay out this money to players related to their talent, longevity, team loyalty, fan devotion, etc. will give you instant insight as to how your spouse will respond to managing your money, as well.
LIFESTYLE. The Yankees are clean-cut with classic pinstripes. The Red Sox are uncensored and a little rough around the edges. Which suits you and your fiancée best? A marriage cannot be based solely on personal appearance but these issues also translate into how a person lives and views the world.
LOYALTY. Any Sox or Yankees fan will defend their team until the end. Don’t you want that kind of loyalty from your husband? The rivalry includes key players, such as once die-hard Boston faithful Johnny Damon, who left the Red Sox for the Yankees and a bigger paycheck. Devotion to a team and a city may be synonymous with commitment to you and your family. Would more money - or anything else - entice your mate to jump ship?
OK, so this is partly all in fun. But even as unconventional a topic as the Red Sox and Yankees rivalry actually does give you the opportunity to have real, important conversations with your spouse-to-be before you walk down that aisle. These basic subjects are just the beginning, so also try covering long work hours, health and fitness, family traditions, traveling, leadership styles, and more.
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